Banned from Cupcake Wars

So one of the things that is different today-- I have banned myself from watching the baking competition show Cupcake Wars on the Food Network.  It used to be one of my all-time-favorite shows, indeed.

When I was single and childless I wrote shows for this network and that's when I learned about the term "food porn." It's the term TV execs...
use to describe the extreme close-ups of food; the ones that make you want to reach right through your TV and sink your teeth into a thick hamburger, dripping with juices-- think Carl's Jr ads.  The notes that would come down from the network invariably included the note, "More food porn!"

So, I know the people behind the scenes know exactly what they're doing when they put sexy shots of cupcakes on the air.  It's food porn, people.  And if you're an addict like me, nothing good can come from watching it.  I imagine if I were a meth-head watching a montage of Walt and Jessie making the prized blue crystal on Breaking Bad, it might be similar.  Or, an alcoholic watching the fancy bottle-flipping sequence in the movie Cocktail.  Okay, maybe less so the Cocktail-thing.

I can deny it no longer.  I admit to myself that watching these shows is not just an innocent, vicarious enjoyment of the wonderful world of cupcake-making.  I am a cupcake addict and watching quirky, camera-friendly people compete to make the most visually appealing, tastiest, most imaginative cupcakes only triggers me.  So take heart family, this show will no longer take up space on our TiVo "Now playing" list.